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TheGlen

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Sing Along With the Old Ones [Jan. 3rd, 2016|01:42 pm]
TheGlen
Are you ready kids?
Tekeli li!
I can't hear you...
TEKELI LI!
Who lives in lost R'lyeh under the sea?
Great Cthulhu!
Slumbering and green and hungry is he!
Great Cthulhu!
If madness and chanting sounds really like fun ...
Great Cthulhu!
Then let's help summon the greatest Old One!
Great Cthulhu!
Ready?
GREAT CTHULHU! GREAT CTHULHU!
Great...Cthuhlu!
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2376-2400 [Dec. 30th, 2015|11:41 am]
TheGlen
2376.  The Dwarven work ethic is not just "Dig until we hit evil."
2377.  When granted a wish use it to unsink the continent the immortals just destroyed.
2378.  When making a wish granted by said immortals, I will leave out the words "you incompetent pricks."
2379.  Can't just use a wish to turn Strahd back to a human.
2380.  No weaponizing the Talisman of Pure Good.
2381.  Just because they can't be the target of raise dead spells doesn't mean elves have no soul.
2382.  In the middle of a black ops can't organize a skeet shoot with office furniture.
2383.  When challenging Death to a game, GMing Paranoia doesn't grant immortality.
2384.  Raise Dead spells are not just for closers.
2385.  Doesn't matter where you hit him, you can't set a bard to shuffle.
2386.  There is no such thing as gnomeophobia.
2387.  I will not give anybody an unreasonable fear of gnomes.
2388.  No matter how high my damage resistance is, I can't name my dwarf Tanky McTankitytank.
2389.  Despite the ridiculously short lifespans, 3rd level doesn't count as epic level for Atruaghins.
2390.  The plan is not just let the villain beat on the dwarf until his arm gets tired.
2391.  If I'm the druid I can't put protestant down as my religion.
2392.  The teleporting spiders attacking us are not just going through a phase.
2393.  The natural enemy of the elf is not the common cold.
2394.  No wasting wishes trying to bring ultravision back to the game.
2395.  No picking the only form of travel the DM isn't familiar with.
2396.  Traveling by sculling is nowhere near as cool as it sounds.
2397.  Any character named Jim Katta is going to be taken from me and burned.
2398.  The Fereldan rules of succession are not just "Two men enter, one man leaves."
2399.  When looking for a template to make a creature deadlier, "Australian" is not a legitimate choice.
2400.  Just because I have the technology, doesn't mean I need to make him better.
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Suggested new Oscar awards [Dec. 28th, 2015|03:35 pm]
TheGlen
Best picture that people actually enjoyed.

Best foreign film seen by more people than just the critics.

Best actor not portraying someone gay, disabled or British.

Best actress in her 40's.

Best trailer that convinced people to watch an absolute trainwreck of a movie.

Best character actor you couldn't pick out of a police line up.  (Nominees include that old guy with more film credits than the rest of the cast combined, the actress you will immediately google to see if she's done nude scenes, the guy that's already been in five movies this year, and Mark Fichtner.)

Best Gary Oldman performance that should have easily been nominated for Best actor except it's Gary Oldman and he makes everybody look bad so fuck him.

Best non-sequel, remake, reboot, rehash, or adaptation.
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Rey's Song [Dec. 20th, 2015|09:31 pm]
TheGlen
Saw Star Wars, was a decent movie, wasn't as good as the first ones.  It was action packed, and had some funny moments. There wasn't an original idea in the entire movie however, and I really didn't care for Rey.  I shall explain my problems with her in the most appropriate way possible, Disney lyrics.

No one's skilled as Rey Sloane
No one's smart as Rey Sloane
No one pilots starships like Rey Sloane
While we hesitate to call her a Mary
No one can match her at all
Just ask any Han, Luke or Chewie
And they will tell you she's a paragon!

No one's teaches Rey Sloane
Learns the Force like Rey Sloane
No one fights like Rey Sloane
Fixes the Falcon like Rey Sloane
With a lightsaber nobody's a natch like Rey Sloan!
For there's no one as naturally adept
As you see, I don't need a teacher
Nothing for her is to irksome!.
That's right!  That's why Disney made made me the feature!

No one climbs like Rey Sloane
Withstands torture like Rey Sloane
In a firefight  nobody blasts like Rey Sloane

I'm especially good with no training! Pew Pew!
The Force is with Rey Sloane!
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Starting to look a lot like syphilis [Dec. 15th, 2015|10:36 am]
TheGlen
So job's gone, been looking for work but this being Christmas and Houston's economy hitting the skids it doesn't look good.  Applied to over 200 jobs, so far only three interviews that were really jobs. 
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Brian Blessed's typing lessons [Nov. 8th, 2015|09:28 pm]
TheGlen
YOU HAVE TO WONDER WHEN BRIAN BLESSED WRITES IN ALL CAPS IS THIS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE?
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What ride [Nov. 6th, 2015|11:37 pm]
TheGlen
In the last few months I made Fallacy Ref which got me interviewed by all sorts of newspapers, the Gandalf was a fighter which got me in more newspapers and more than one death threat, and now I've lost my job!!!  On the plus side GF is moving down and the artist is moving away.  Been a wild one.  Adding to the list soon as soon as I find the paper with 23 more additions and add the one about not adding 'only to red light sensors' to my invisibility power.
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My long absence is rewarded [Oct. 20th, 2015|12:11 am]
TheGlen

Been working on the Fallacy Ref application.  I'm pleased to say at least for Android it's ready.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.azarkardeprod.fallacyref

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#8 Boromir [Oct. 7th, 2015|12:49 am]
TheGlen
BoromirCollapse )
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#7 Frodo [Oct. 7th, 2015|12:48 am]
TheGlen
FrodoCollapse )
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